Sex worker funny stuff from around the web!

Ever shave ur pussy so smooth u wish u could eat it urself?
A brothel where you can also sell stolen goods, its called "Straddle the Fence"
Lips made for love, hips made for sin
Bras just look better on the floor
Your smile is perfect..........not as perfect as your tits, but still.
A fuck so dirty you’re seeing stars afterwards
Titties are the best medicine.
I dont have a dirty mind i have a sexy imagination.
I hate being humiliated, unless it's on my own terms with a safe word.
A big dick doesn't count if half of it is your personality
Lips made for love, hips made for sin
Nothing puts a spring in my step like a freshly trimmed bush.
For an extra $100 I will fuck you with the lights strobed.
Now that’s a lamp!
Fucking is just that; fucking
Making love is an art
Do guys with foot fetishes know about vaginas?
In the words of my Nan "try everything twice, except anal"
I've paid for sex before...not with money, but with my emotions.
She said "i've seen smaller" so ya it's been a good day
One of the biggest differences between men and women is what they think of when they hear the word "facial".
It’s only a wifi hotspot if I’m near it
I made handcuffs from my broken halo.....

....wanna play?
I like my men how I like my coffee:

Filling me up every morning.
I choose my porn the same way I order at a restaurant, nothing I’d get at home.
If I was an angel, I’d wrap my wings around you but I’m not so my legs will have to do
I may have fallen from grace but it's more fun down here.
Sex so hot, the smoke detector goes off.
I love men because they have a built in sex toy
if ur wife doesn’t wanna bang u why would i
You say ‘sex addict’, like it’s a bad thing.
I prefer jizz connoisseur.
If he calls them tittays, he doesn’t know what to do with them.
I’m “milf porn is now age appropriate porn” years old
Let’s watch horror movies and make our own porn.
Damn near had a threesome last night. Just needed 2 more people.
I like to start my week with bruised knees from Sunday morning head and after-church anal.
Sex so good you leave your panties behind.
I went to a Red Light district once. The traffic was terrible.
Good morning to everyone except the ladies who don’t maintain eye contact while sucking dick
She was unique, like a stripper in sensible shoes.
All I’m saying is if cum tasted like nacho cheese, there’d be a lot more swallowing going on.
There's men who want to pay for sex, and men who have to pay for sex
I don't like the term "anal bleaching".

I prefer "changing my ringtone".
Who called them titty pics and not peek a boobs