Sex worker funny stuff from around the web!

Your smile is perfect..........not as perfect as your tits, but still.
I may have fallen from grace but it's more fun down here.
Good morning to everyone except the ladies who don’t maintain eye contact while sucking dick
Lips made for love, hips made for sin
I hate being humiliated, unless it's on my own terms with a safe word.
There's men who want to pay for sex, and men who have to pay for sex
A big dick doesn't count if half of it is your personality
A brothel where you can also sell stolen goods, its called "Straddle the Fence"
You say ‘sex addict’, like it’s a bad thing.
Fucking is just that; fucking
Making love is an art
A fuck so dirty you’re seeing stars afterwards
if ur wife doesn’t wanna bang u why would i
Sex so good you leave your panties behind.
I don't like the term "anal bleaching".

I prefer "changing my ringtone".
Do guys with foot fetishes know about vaginas?
[Strip club]

Him: *counting change* How much for just one boob
If he calls them tittays, he doesn’t know what to do with them.
In the words of my Nan "try everything twice, except anal"
I like my men how I like my coffee:

Filling me up every morning.
I’m “milf porn is now age appropriate porn” years old
I love men because they have a built in sex toy
Ever shave ur pussy so smooth u wish u could eat it urself?
Damn near had a threesome last night. Just needed 2 more people.
She was unique, like a stripper in sensible shoes.
Bras just look better on the floor
It’s only a wifi hotspot if I’m near it
I dont have a dirty mind i have a sexy imagination.
I prefer jizz connoisseur.
Titties are the best medicine.
Let’s watch horror movies and make our own porn.
I like to start my week with bruised knees from Sunday morning head and after-church anal.
I made handcuffs from my broken halo.....

....wanna play?
All I’m saying is if cum tasted like nacho cheese, there’d be a lot more swallowing going on.
Nothing puts a spring in my step like a freshly trimmed bush.
Sex so hot, the smoke detector goes off.
Who called them titty pics and not peek a boobs
For an extra $100 I will fuck you with the lights strobed.
I choose my porn the same way I order at a restaurant, nothing I’d get at home.
If I was an angel, I’d wrap my wings around you but I’m not so my legs will have to do
I've paid for sex before...not with money, but with my emotions.
She said "i've seen smaller" so ya it's been a good day
One of the biggest differences between men and women is what they think of when they hear the word "facial".
I went to a Red Light district once. The traffic was terrible.
Lips made for love, hips made for sin
Now that’s a lamp!